Tried the Starbucks protein coffee so you don’t have to… not bad, but I’m still

I filmed this because my feed was suddenly obsessed with getting macros from a drive through window. I grabbed an iced version on a Tuesday morning expecting a decent vanilla latte situation. Instead I got a cup of chalky disappointment. Even though my page usually focuses on skincare or makeup routines, I figured protein fits right into that same morning maintenance category.

The actual taste is fine for the first two sips before the texture truly hits you. If you look closely at the plastic cup around the fifteen second mark of the video, you can see this weird powdery film clinging to the ice cubes. It feels like drinking sand that someone lightly flavored with artificial sweetener. You are much better off brewing coffee at home and stirring in a scoop of a powder you actually like.

The app algorithm completely buried this post. It stalled out at just over two hundred views. The people who actually watched it were extremely vocal in the comments though. Nearly a fifth of you interacted just to agree with me or to complain about the weird lingering aftertaste you experienced too. We all clearly want a lazy shortcut for our morning nutrition. Nobody wants it badly enough to pay six dollars for gritty milk.